Sunday, May 31, 2009

a jar full of cocks floating in brine

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:41:12 PM)
hello

Pat - (8): (11:42:06 PM)
hey whats up

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:42:15 PM)
not much really... you?

Pat - (8)says: (11:43:19 PM)
same...chillin at home...kinda bored lol

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:43:34 PM)
haha

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:43:41 PM)
i'm watching lord of the rings

Pat - (8) says: (11:44:07 PM)
ooo fun...so yea...hope you dont mind me saying, but you look sexy in tattoos :P

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:44:23 PM)
haah thanks... i enjoy them

Pat - (8) says: (11:44:38 PM)
lol can i enjoy them? ;p lmao jkjk

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:44:43 PM)
haha

Pat - (8) says: (11:45:01 PM)
we could do some picture exchange

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:45:36 PM)
haha... what kind...

Pat - (8) says: (11:45:44 PM)
any kind

Pat - (8) says: (11:46:42 PM)
im completely open so i am comfortable with whatever...like i could send you something completely revealing and i wouldnt be embarrassed or anything and i wouldnt expect anything like it in return...im weird lol

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:47:19 PM)
haha

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:47:23 PM)
i see

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:47:38 PM)
well looking at pictures of dicks really isn't my deal...

Pat - (8) says: (11:48:10 PM)
lol i'm sure you would get a little smile if you looked at mine ;) lmao

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:50:12 PM)
hahaha

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:50:23 PM)
i'm sure it's lovely... still not my bag

Pat - (8) says: (11:50:42 PM)
lol you are right...it would be MY bag :P

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:51:02 PM)
haha

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:51:11 PM)
i guess that's true

Pat - (8) says: (11:51:42 PM)
lol well lets just say...if you like extra size....you might take a second glance at mine :P lmao

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (11:57:16 PM)
haha i see


(Another go-no-where msn chat with horny guys.)

hey gorgeous! :):) :)

The return of poun_eater, who Traci first pointed out in this entry.

I'm Michel nice to meet you.Um...I dunno there's many things that I guess I like paranormal things that normal plp can't grasp becuz I've experienced some pretty weird shit. Um...and at the sametime I have a really strong faith and I don't push it on anyone yet I won't let anyone deny me of the truth as well.Anyways I'm 23 I have 5 piercings and 2 tats don't confuse that for me being tough cuz deep down I'm sensitive type of guy yet tough when I need to be. I like to listen to all sorts of christian alternative, christian metal ,metal core, hardcore, mainstream, speed metal, alternative,industrial,punk, progressive rock,classic rock, psychadelic rock, blues and a bit of everything really as long as it has a good beat and positive lyrics. I'm learning to play guitar and I'm also in the church quire and young adults group at church.although I got to church I'm not perfect and still make mistakes. I'm Honest, Loyal, Trustworthy, Patient, Compassionate, sweet,Understanding, Passive, Caring, Loving, Kind, Generous, Empathetic,down to earth, Sympathetic, Courageous, good sense of humour yet serious when I need to be, can be quite social or reserved at times, I love to help plp or to make plp feel good about themselves when I see that plp our in need.Um... I'd like to get to know you more if ur interested. I'm not the type of guy that's pushy I like to take my time to get to know plp and I'm not looking for a relationship I'm just gonna take it as it comes. If u have msn u can add me ill****_03@*******.com

(So you send me this...mess of a run on sentence twice, and only thing that is different is you put more smiley faces in the subject line? Well, I will defiantly read this assault on the English language now!

Saturday, May 30, 2009

chat 1st ttyl

hi there how are you male 33 ottawa i do have msn and yahoo and also a cam, sorry i dont post or send pics, i am a gen manager of a car dealership family buss,and married, looking for what your looking for, been very bored and very horny high sex drive here, cute and sexxy, can always call me and hook up and i can host, discreetion is a must and also i am not into mind games and BS, if you care to chat sometime, fill me in send me your msn or yahoo, ttys, bye for now.....

Babe, let me see that thoooong


(Based on this guy's profile, I assume it's a joke but HAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG HAHAHAHA. Amazing.)

i do

lol those twins look delicious how are you

Bidness

While Traci gets all the kinky freaks, and rude gang-stars, I get business propositions...


From: PARTYNOW69
Subject: Silk Screener

Hi there, I have a bit of a different question for you. I own a promotional business in the Ottawa Valley. I actually just bought the place. I get my silk screening done in Ottawa on colonnade rd. Is that the silk screening you mean, that goes on shirts and stuff? If so, can you send me the name of your work, so I can get prices from you guys.

(Why would this ever be a good idea?)

From: tennislover76
Subject: hello beautiful


First off this is not spam i just have no other way to reach Canadians.
I'm signed up with an online survey site based out of canada and they give me a decent fee to refer canadians. You wont get rich but u can make a few hundred a year when youre bored. Do you want me to refer you? All I need is email and first name and they'll send you an email.

(No way to reach Canadians?! Oh, Heaven above!)

love the tatts (part III msn version)

(Holy fuck boring. This is why I don't like adding randos to my msn.)

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:52:33 PM)
hey

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:52:42 PM)
hello

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:52:51 PM)
whos this?

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:53:12 PM)
the girl you just told to add to msn cause i'd like your bod

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:53:21 PM)
lol oh ok

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:53:24 PM)
got a cam??

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:53:28 PM)
haah no

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:53:33 PM)
ok

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:53:45 PM)
so `sup??

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:53:53 PM)
not much really.. ou?
Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:54:02 PM)
notta

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:54:05 PM)
u in ottawa?

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:54:54 PM)
yep

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:55:01 PM)
same here

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:55:14 PM)
cool

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:57:31 PM)
so..

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:57:44 PM)
so what u doing

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:58:03 PM)
nothing really. chillin on the couch

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:58:07 PM)
doing laudnry

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:58:10 PM)
fun times

Dan :P Miss U grand maman! says: (1:58:12 PM)
thats sucks

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (1:58:18 PM)
haha i guess

love the tatts (part II)

add me on and i will, ull like my bod

(His 'bod' eh. Well I guess I should add him shouldn't I?! I'm totally going to. brb, again.)

love the tatts

hey liove ur tats and piercing would love to get to know u add me b*****46@hotmail.com im worth it

(This is a day for impatient attention seekers I guess, because he sent me another message two minutes later. )

saw u came by my page.. u gonna add me?

(Then after I told him I don't add people to my msn, which obviously was a lie I just don't feel like talking to him, he sent me this.)

aww to bad im wirth it

(I'm asking him to prove to me he's worth it. brb)

lion

baby if your big body was all over me i would roar like a lion arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr



(Then 7 minutes later, he sent me this. Pure gold!)



fat ass r u going to right me back or what? i love the big chicki would love to put my sausage in ur big buns

Thursday, May 28, 2009

"Oh no, boners"

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:20:02 PM)
yo do u wanna have nsa sex ?

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:20:07 PM)
i know wild q

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:20:11 PM)
but im kinda needin it as of late

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:20:11 PM)
lol

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (10:20:29 PM)
um

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:21:36 PM)
um ?

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (10:21:48 PM)
um... no

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:22:22 PM)
lol

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:22:30 PM)
kinda knew that was coming

favre20@hotmail.com says: (10:22:36 PM)
i would understand if u block me lol

Traci, a jar full of cocks floating in brine. says: (10:22:46 PM)
hah

poun_eater

poun_eater
(There are no words. Please just look at his profile. He sings in a Church "Quire".)

Hi

I like your style and i wish you be my friend,because i am going to kiss evry singel tato in your body. I love women with tatos . send me a message if you arew intresting to see me ok. dont be shy.

hi

what a gorgeous rack!

Alexxio1 or is it sporty-sport1?



(Does this look familiar? He changed his user name, and in a boring unfunny email he sent me the second picture. Why would he think that spreading his legs would be a turn on? It's not like I got a glimpse of his cock or anything. Though that would make for a better post.)

Im like Ontario "Your'sTo Discover"

Mmmmm oh my peek a boo i'm dave care to chat? My IM's don't work here on pof do you yahoo or msn?

cheers dave

(This is Dave. He likes to compare himself to Ontario and thinks I should "discover" him. Awkward topless shot award goes to him I think. Yes this is also the second message he sent me.)

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

nico

i was wondering if u could take nude tasteful pics of me
thanks

Hello beautiful

I like you beg tits let me suck them on. Tatoo waaaw... I wanna know you babe

Awkward Topless Shots



(This dude felt the need posting two.)



(This dude felt it important to show off his rims. They're not spinners, so I'm not very impressed.)


Im like Ontario "Your'sTo Discover"

Mmmmmmmm oh my peek a boo I'm dave care to chat?

(Check out the subject line for this gem of an email.)

hummmm

i like hun

Friday, May 22, 2009

bj

can u give me one :)

(yes 'bj' was the subject of this message. hilarious!)

wow

Your tits look unreal.... can I see them?

hi

wow nice cleve my blank would fit just nice in that , sorry for the upfront message at least its honest

I love my friends!

B****: asl
u liek big cox?
T****: hahahahahhaa
i lov eyou b****. hahahaha
B****:address?
T****: check my profilez. haha oor are you being serious?
B****: ahaha! it's e****.
T****: bahahahahha
B****: I needz to know for tomorrow. lol.
T****: that's what i thought
B**** : you should plenty of fuck this.
T****: hahaha i was totally thinking about it
maybe i will
bahahaha

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

just think about ur dreamboy and let ur fantasie free

marques.1: wat up septum?
She.z In Control: are you serious?
marques.1: come on its a joke
so wat r u up to?
She.z In Control: not much... just listening to podcasts.
marques.1: play along with me, wat would u do if i were there now?
She.z In Control: i don't think i'm interested in the game you're playing.
marques.1: just think about ur dreamboy and let ur fantasie free
She.z In Control: i've already been with my fantasy boy.


(Him again? Look how nerdy I am, dropping podcasts to make me look cool.)

I am a sissy, humilate, and laugh at me!




(He dresses better than me.)

Charmed1977


(He looks like Voldemort. DO NOT WANT!)

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

sporty-sport1


(I don't even... what... the... hell.... I'm so creeped out.)

hey

marques.1:wat r those tattoos on ur tittis?
She.z In Control: they're not on my "titties". they're on my chest. and they're old style pin up girls.
marques.1: do u got anu more tattoos or piercings?
She.z In Control: yes i have 5 more and my septum pierced.
marques.1: wat is septum? wait a min. is that wat i think it is?does it hurt?
She.z In Control: i have a feeling it's NOT what you think it is. it's the part between your nostrils. and yes, it hurt a lot.
marques.1: does it feel good if i touch it?
She.z In Control: um... no.
marques.1: why not?
She.z In Control: i have a feeling you don't understand where the septum is.


this is a septum piercing. there is no feeling in that part of the body.
marques.1: why don't u say nose?i'm so embarassed, i thought it's down there
She.z In Control:i already told you it wasn't what you thought it was. and said it was the part between your nostrils. what more do you want me to say?
marques.1: all right babe.wat u like on a guy?

(Reading skills are usually something I look for in a guy. Well, any skills really...)

Lots of Laughs

Hello I find you sexy for a geek and nice boobs by the way MMMMMMM Yummy

(It's too early for me to think of a stupid come back. Ughhh... loser.)

Monday, May 18, 2009

hi

dam, nice boobs, do u like to watch guys cumon cam?

trev

(love it.)

Sunday, May 17, 2009

hello

hi how are u?
i like something on your body,i like to bit tehm

(I can haz spellchek?)

hey

hey sexy u wanna take control over me

(I really wish someone would notice that my POF name is a Chromeo song and has nothing to do with taking control of dicks.)

Your Subject Line Here

i like your chesticles

(Chesticles? Are you serious?)